Strange New Thoughts

The place where I slam down gauntlets and pick up the pieces.

Monday, June 05, 2006

Dimitry, The Cuddly, Furry Porcupine

Poor Dimitry! All the other porcupines had protective spines with which to defend themselves against predators. Dimitry, however, had thick, luxurious fur. All the other forest animals loved to cuddle him, except for the predators, who could only think how tasty he would be. The skunks and the other porcupines protected him, but he longed for the freedom and independence his protectors enjoyed.

One day his friend Ladislav the skunk looked up from his taxonomy textbook and stared hard at Dimitry. His gaze flickered between the book and the soft, cuddly porcupine. Finally, Ladislav found his voice:

“Dimitry! You’re not a porcupine - you’re a chinchilla!”

Dimitry didn’t wait for the rest. He knew in his heart, had known all along, that what Ladislav had said was true. After all, the name “porcupine” literally means “spiny pig”, and Dimitry was neither of these. Why, he had only escaped from the chinchilla farm two months before, thinking how much fun it would be to swat an attacking bobcat with his prickly tail. How foolish he had been! In his reverie he had never considered the huge chasm between daydream and reality. This went beyond mere stupidity. Porcupines are noted for their sharply limited intelligence, and Dimitry wasn’t even a porcupine to begin with.

Somehow Dimitry had to get back to where he once belonged. Abruptly excusing himself, he set off for the chinchilla farm, a mere quarter mile away. Fate smiled on him and he arrived safely, only to be made into a fur coat. Fate may have smiled on him, but there’s more than one way to smile.